Hooking up with a submissive is something that a lot of men fantasize about, and if you’re one of them, we’re here to give you some tips. It doesn’t matter if you’re in Leeds or in any other part of the world–submissives all require the same care, and while it might change from person to person, the basic concepts are still the same. If you know how to handle your submissive properly in a BDSM setting, you’ll get a great reputation, and that’s exactly what you want. The top internet adult dating sites might have a bit of information about this, but not nearly as much as you need–which is what we’re here for.
Assess Their Needs
Before you end up hopping in a bed with a submissive partner, you need to really asses their needs. You need to find out what they’re really into in the sack, and what makes them tick. If you know these things, you’ll end up being a much better Dominant to them, and that’s a fact. This is why communication is so incredibly important in situations like this, and why you really can’t waste time in this regard. Talk to them, and figure out what they’re really looking for in a Dominant. Chances are, they’ve been around to the top internet adult dating sites, and really know what they’re looking for in this regard.
If they aren’t, then talk them through it. The more that you chat with them about what you want, the more likely they are to have ideas of their own. While they might be submissive in bed, they might have a very forward personality in day to day life. That means that you need to take the reins and pull them back as necessary. As a good Dominant, you’ll be able to do this, and really be able to help them realize that certain aspects of their fantasies are better than others. You’ll really be able to see what makes them happy, and be able to give them what they need whether you’re in Leeds, or anywhere else. It is not easy to find willing and submissive single British girls. So, take care of their needs. Check our comparison guide of the best adult dating sites and get some interesting tips from the top sites.
Talk About Scenarios
Once you’ve really figured out what makes your submissive tick, you need to talk to them about the kinds of scenarios that they might be into. If you can do this, you’ll really end up nailing down the kind of fun that you two are going to be having in the sack, and that’s exactly what you should be looking forward to. You should also realize that as a Dominant, you really need to discuss with them at length about what they want. You really can’t skimp on this kind of thing.
The more you talk and plan, the better. You really can’t plan enough for your scenarios, and that’s a fact. You need to be as prepared as possible, especially if the two of you are going to be acting out a scene that involves any kind of consent play, or a scene that requires you to have certain items and toys available. This is why planning in advance and planning out your scenarios is so incredibly important. Don’t forget to do this, because trust us, men on the top internet adult dating sites won’t forget to do it, either.
What Are Their Kinks?
Finding out what your submissive really likes is important, and this, of course, really includes kinks. Maybe they’re really into rape fantasy, and that’s great. You can cater to that, and really give them exactly what they need. You need to take the time to figure out this sort of thing, though, or it’s never going to bloom as well as it possibly can in the bedroom. You want to please them and really make them excited to be with you, so take the time to figure out what she’s into, and really go for it.
Even if their kink isn’t your kink, there’s usually a peaceful median that can be reached. You need to strive towards that at all costs. You’ll be able to help her get the greatest experience that she can possibly have if you do this all right, and that’s really what you’re wanting to have happen. Figure out her kinks, and you’ve figured out the key to really getting her off. Communication is key in this area, as it is in every single other part of BDSM, so make sure you just take the time to figure this sort of thing out.
Safe Words and Boundaries
You should never end up hooking up with a submissive without having a safe word in place. Remember, this isn’t just for her protection–it’s also for yours. You really don’t want to end up in a situation where the consent is sketchy, as it’s going to be your ass on the line. You need to establish a safe word so that she knows she can always use it and be comfortable with the idea of it. Never, ever end up in a BDSM relationship with a sub that refuses to use a safe word. It’s just a bad idea.
You should also make sure that you know your submissive’s hard and soft limits. Their hard limits are what they absolutely refuse to ever do, and their soft limits are what they will do or tolerate in small amounts. Knowing these limits will make it much easier for you to dominate them, and it will be much easier for you to really give them what they want. You can bend only their soft limits to a degree, but a respectful Dominant will completely avoid those hard limits. Make sure you talk about this at length, or you’ll end up in an awkward situation later on.
If you’re hooking up with a submissive, it might please the two of you to draw up a contract between the two of you. You will be able to outline all of your interests, kinks, and what is expected of the two of you. These kinds of contracts can be part of the kinky BDSM experience, but remember, they aren’t binding by law at all. They’re just for fun, and the two of you should realize that before you end up trying to throw them against one another later on.
Contracts don’t necessarily just have to be about kinks and the like. They can be actual slave contracts for consensual slaves, and if that’s something that you and your hookup want to get into, go for it–but make sure you’re fully informed about this beforehand, and that she is, too. She needs to know what she’s getting into, and you need to be willing to accept all of the responsibilities that come with having a consensual slave. Make sure you’re ready for that before you draw that kind of thing up.
There a dozen more aspects to having a submissive partner at least, and it’s up to you to really do more research and find out all that you can before diving straight in. Take the time to figure out this sort of thing, and you’ll end up having a much more satisfying time in the sack. That’s something we can swear by, and it’s really done us favors.